Today's passage is Matthew 19:13-22.
When the disciples rebuke those bringing children for Jesus to bless, he rebukes the disciples and says the kingdom of heaven belongs to those like children. When a rich young man wants to know what he needs to do to get to heaven, Jesus tells him to keep five of the ten commandments plus love his neighbor as himself. When the rich man claims he does, Jesus tells him to sell all he has and follow him. The rich young man walks sadly away.
The rich young man wants everything in this life and in heaven too.
He's hopeful he can have it.
Like one of the little children who received Jesus' blessing ahead of him, he wants Jesus to bless him and his desires.
He's looking for something to do to earn or buy his way into heaven.
"What good thing must I do?" So Jesus tells him.
"Keep the commandments." Instead of saying he does, the rich man wants to be absolutely certain he's kept the right ones because there are so many.
He's got something of a legalistic mind. Jesus reduces the commandments to six.
Loving God with all his heart is not one of them, although it's implied.
The young man says he obeys them but he still feels that he's missing something. And he's right. He lacks humility, he lacks wholehearted trust in God.
His wealth is protecting him from dependence on God.
When Jesus points that out by telling him to sell everything he has, to drop the shield of money that buys him every comfort in life, he knows he can't.
So he walks away sad, but not contrite. He keeps his money, buys earthly security, trades heaven for it, and walks away with the ironic blessing that he knows he has consciously and willfully done it,. That's why he's sad. He got his answer but he won't accept it.
When I was young I wanted to be rich and famous because those seemed like good things to have. I accepted the world's view of happiness.
I didn't see that they got in the way of anything better or more important.
As I got older I didn't really change my attitude.
All I changed was the degrees of wealth and the degrees of fame.
I didn't see that everything, including wealth and fame, comes at a price.
When I lost most of my pension money in the bank crisis in 1990s, I was furious.
When I could not even take what remained due to government tax rules because I was a non-resident of Canada, I was even more angry.
What I didn't see was that I lacked all humility.
What I didn't have was peace of mind.
What I didn't have was trust in God.
To help me get some of those, the Lord allowed my situation.
Through years of Wooridle Church training, doing QT, going to mokjang, listening to testimonies, reading spiritual books, God blessed me with a little humility.
I wrote a letter of confession and apology to my government concerning the forms and documents they required of me. Amazingly, my money was released.
Grudgingly at first but with increasing joy, I gave it away because I wanted to follow God.
It was hard letting go of my anger and my dependence on money.
As I did, though, I began to see how spiritual money is. I had always believe it was physical, but I started to see that it was spirit, like God.
At the same time, my trust in God began to grow because I was coming to see that he really was bigger than money and that I could depend on him to give me what I needed when I needed it.
This was a watershed experience for me, which still continues.
God is bigger than money. I and my attitude are the problems, not my circumstances.
Lord, I pray you continue to love me and be patient with me as I learn to trust you more and depend on you more for your road is the way I want to go.
Forgive me my outrageous pride.
Thank you for your lessons in humility. Make me into the kind of child you blessed in today's passage.
