Today’s passage is Matthew 14:22-36.
After feeding the five thousand Jesus sends his disciples across the lake, dismisses the crowd and goes up a mountain to pray. At three in the morning, when the disciples see Jesus walking across the lake they are frightened.
When Peter receives assurance that Jesus is Jesus, he walks on water towards him but loses his nerve, starts sinking and has to be rescued by Jesus, who asks him why he had so little faith.
Jesus gets in the boat and the winds immediately calm, prompting the disciples to declare he is the Son of God. When they reach Gennesaret, people brought the sick to him believing that any who touched his cloak would be healed. And they were.
In the feeding of the five thousand the disciples’ earthbound faith separates them from Jesus again today. Jesus walks on water but they can’t.
The disciples looked at the five loaves and two fishes and saw inadequacy. The five thousand expected Jesus to feed them and they were.
The disciples looked at the waves and the wind and saw a big problem.
The Gennesaret crowd expected to be healed and they were.
Unlike the crowd, the disciples could not get past their eyes to the kingdom of God. They were not mustard seeds or yeast, couldn’t find the treasure or great pearl, couldn’t separate weeds from wheat and were not even good soil for God’s word.
And me, what can’t I get past? What keeps blocking me from seeing the kingdom, the healing, the daily bread, the walkability of water?
I have an ESL teacher who can’t teach elementary school kids.
He’s okay with middle school and high school kids and he’s a superb basketball coach, but he can’t teach the little guys.
The elementary school teachers#8212;all experienced ESL teachers#8212;are furious at his failure and, despite their giving him lessons, his refusal to use those lessons.
They are naturally angry at me for not fixing the problem.
This teacher doesn’t see how big his problem is.
He admits he has a problem with little kids but doesn’t think it’s serious.
His blindness infuriates me as much as his incompetence infuriates the other teachers. They want me to fire him. I want to fire him too.
But, despite both the external pressure on me and the internal pressure from myself, I am not at my school to throw people away.
This is a big lesson God has been continually teaching me.
So, what am I not seeing that can truly help this man become a better teacher and a better Christian?
What I’m not seeing is me. I am the problem. I don’t want to give the time and energy to sincerely pray for him and counsel him through my testimony.
In part I have been blinded by his Christianity.
I thought his faith in the Lord would be enough, but it’s not because he has no application.
My teacher can’t teach kids well because he can’t establish a good working relationship with them.
He can’t do that because he’s got an unresolved relationship issue, most likely with his wife.
I can help because I had relational problems that I didn’t see with my first wife and with Mallory(almost second wife).
Jesus is calling me to walk on water and I’m sinking like Peter because I’m looking at all the distracting problems in dealing with this teacher.
I’m not focused on Jesus.
My relationship with the Lord is as wobbly as Peter’s steps on the water.
So early next week, I will meet this teacher to share my testimony and invite him to couples mokjang.
Lord, give me an expectation of your sufficiency on all occasions and in all circumstances.
